AJ was pacing the room angrily. He stopped when he heard a knock on the door.

"Lunch!" He said outloud.

He yanked the door open. "It's about damn time-"

He froze when he saw who his visitors were.

Before anyone could say a word, Nick shoved his way past the girls and into the room. "God! Kevin has gone nuts! Him and that security guard almost - " He stopped short when he realized AJ had visitors. "Oh."

AJ turned back to Sarah. "What are you doing here? And who is she?"

"How can you treat family this way?!" Sarah accused.

This is not the man I almost married. She thought.

"Family?!"

Sarah shook her head in disgust. "That makes me sorry to have to tell you."

"Tell me what?"

"That i'm pregnant... and it's yours."

A simultaneous gasp escapes Nick and AJ.

Silence filled the room. So did one of Nick's farts.

That's the last time I eat burritos and twinkies at the same time.

Keveena broke the silence with a startling confession. "I'm pregnant too... it is also yours."

"Who are you?" AJ inquired of the tall drink of water. "Wait I know! You're the chick from Hooters! No no, from that strip club on Sunset Strip. ... the one on Bleecker? 75th? In Las Vegas?... Did we meet in Aspen? Or was it Manhattan? No no Miami!"

"Uh yes.... it was all of those."

Sarah broke in. "I thought you two were cousins."

"We are! He's my cousin."

"Gasp!" AJ gasped. "I know that phrase!"

He ripped off Keveena's wig.

"Kevin!" AJ tossed the wig on the ground.

Nick's mouth dropped open in shock. "Oh... my... god.... You got Kevin pregnant?!"

"Nick, guys can't get other guys pregnant."

"Are you sure, Kevin? Cause I saw this movie with Arnold Swartzenneger and Danny Devito and - " Kevin cut him off with a slap upside the head.

"Ow! You got some long nails!"

They're press on. I borrowed them from Howie."

Nick picked up Kevin's wig from the floor and put it on.

"Why are you wearing nails?" AJ demanded. "Why are you wearing a dress? Why are you telling me you're pregnant?"

"To get your attention!"

"Or maybe to get my child support!" AJ accused.

"Ooh, he's got a point." Nick chimed in.

"Why would I want your money?" Kevin said, ignoring Nick. "I already have more than I know what to do with."

"I don't know. Maybe... maybe... maybe to support your habit!"

Kevin pointed at AJ. "YOU'RE the one with the habit!"

"You're the one with the expensive wedding!... Maybe you can't pay the bill! Or maybe you want another one!"

"Why would I want another wedding?!"

"I don't know. Maybe this one ain't workin' out so well. Maybe you're a lousy husband!"

"Oh yeah! This coming from someone who can't even make a commitment!"

"I can commit to kicking your ass!"

"Guys stop it!" Sarah pleaded.

"Stay out of this, baby."

"Always 'baby baby baby'. And then what? Does she know what beverage you've been drinking? Does she?"

AJ's mouth opened slightly. He looked from Sarah to Kevin and back to Sarah again. Then back to Kevin. Then to Nick, who was trying to figure out how to work the lightswitch.

"Um... water... or maybe pink lemonade. I don't really remember." AJ tried to lie.

"Stop with the BS!"

"Okay, it was flavored water!"

"Good one. Try Mountain Dew."

Sarah let out a little indistinguishable sound. She had thought as much, but she wasn't sure. Whenever she pressed AJ for answers, he always mumbled something about drawing bubble baths and rubber duckies.

"Why don't you mind your business?!!!"

"You are my business!"

"Guys, I have an idea." Nick butted in, still wearing Kevin's wig. "Why don't we get Elmo over here and we can all sing "One Small Voice".

"Nick - " Kevin tried interrupting.

"Remember when we did that on Sesame Street that one time and how it cheered us all up?"

Kevin put his hand over his face in annoyance. "Nick."

"I'll call him! Do you think he has a cell?

Kevin slowly removed his hand from his face. "Nick... elmo isn't real."

"Ha!"

"Elmo is not real, Nick."

Nick held back his laughter. He walks over to Kevin with a sly smile on his face. He puts his hand on his face.

"Now I suppose you'll tell me Big Bird isn't real either."

"Nick, they are all puppets."

Nick let out a shrill gasp.

He leaned towards Kevin. "You," He poked a finger to Kevin's nose. "Take that back."

Kevin roughly pushed Nick's hand out of his face. "No."

"I said take it back!" Nick hissed.

He pushed his hand in palm against Kevin's mouth, smearing his lipstick across his face.

They stood nose to nose, both breathing heavily.

Kevin gave Nick a small shove.

Nick gave Kevin a slightly bigger shove.

Kevin glared at Nick, sweat dripping down his face. He grabbed the wig off his head.

"Listen to me, you sniveling little weasel. Elmo is a puppet."

"GASP!"

"Big Bird is a puppet."

"GASP!!"

"Every character on Sesame Street is a puppet." He emphasized the last three words.

GAAAASP!!!!"

Nick grabbed Kevin's blouse and yanked it off. Underneath Kevin was wearing a 36DD bra stuffed with oranges.

Everyone stared without saying a word. No one needed to. The moment said it all.

Kevin's face flushed a bright pink. "What?!.... I wanted to look realistic!"

Nick pointed at the bra and laughed hysterically.

Kevin shoved Nick so hard that he flew across the room and out the open window.

Kevin stood still, his chest heaving. The sweat had his make-up dripping down his face. He looked like a cheap whore caught in the rain.

"You look like a cheap whore caught in the rain." AJ pointed out.

"You would know!" Kevin retorted.

"Don't get sassy with me! You're the one walking around in a bra stuffed with oranges!"

Him and Sarah double over with laughter.

Kevin adjusted his fruit bra and put his wig back on.

"If you'll excuse me, I want to leave while I still have my dignity."

As he slowly strode towards the door, head held high, his skirt loosened. He tried to reach for it, but wasn't fast enough.

It fell to the floor. He was left wearing nothing but a woman's wig, a bra filled with oranges, and Britney Spears boxers.

AJ and Sarah fell to the floor laughing.

Kevin looked down sheepishly.

"Ha! Ha!" AJ couldn't find any words. "Ha! Ha!"

Kevin turned and ran out of the room.

AJ got up and ran to the door. He held up the skirt. "Hey Kevin! You forgot your prom dress!"

Him and Sarah roared with laughter.

Kevin kept on going.